Me: Conference starts after lunch. I need to go downstairs and learn the levels and various rooms.
Brain: You just want to see the give-aways.
Me: Please. I am a professional. OMG! Look at all this SWAG!!!
Brain: You do realize that these booths aren’t open yet.
Me: They left this stuff out for us.
Brain: You are giddily stealing notepads, legal pads, post it notes, and pens.
Me: Isn’t it AMAZING?!?!?! Wait. Where are the highlighters?!
Brain: And people wonder why you never married.